Stop Relying On Your Eyes...Lover Of Your Heart (Part II)

The original blog post, Stop Relying On Your Eyes To Choose The Lover Of Your Heart, was written with love for all women.  I believe men also gained wisdom from that perspective.  This version in Part II is specifically written from a man's perspective to a man.  May women benefit from this writing as well.

She enters Kona Grill with her lady companions.  It's another afternoon out with the girls.  Her top teases with minimal cleavage.  Her jean skirt is made specifically for her curves.  Her heels compliment her legs and her smile can be seen for miles.  The guy caught in awe says to himself, "She's the one."  But this isn't the first time he's made this claim.  Unknown to him; she is educated, a hard worker, goal oriented, serves her community, loves animals, has a heart for God and needs Jesus like himself.  She hasn't had luck with guys but yearns for true love.  It's hard to find a man after God's heart so she finds comfort in her family, friends and occasional regretful acts.  After she settles at her table and has her first drink he sends her a second beverage.  They make eye contact.  We know the rest of the story, it's textbook.

In the book of Deuteronomy chapter twenty two it states, "If a man find a damsel (young woman or maid) that is a virgin, which is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found; then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel's father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife; because he has humbled her, he may not put her away all his days."

Today, this perspective of a man courting a woman is far removed from our culture.  The world has drifted away from a committed mindset.  The current mindset is teenagers becoming parents.  The current mindset is the morning after pill.  The current mindset is abortion.  The current mindset is living with a woman for years without marrying her.  The current mindset is child support court.  The current mindset is divorce court.  Guys, when are we going to set our minds on what may prevent these issues?

When a guy encounters instant pain due to poor choices, at that moment he seeks a release from the pressure.  Age doesn't make a guy transition into a man.  I know some 30-60 year old boys.  We must put away childish things.  (1 Corinthians 13:11)  In 1 Corinthians chapter six it says, "Flee fornication.  Every sin that a man does is without the body; but he that commits fornication sins against his own body."  HIV, unplanned pregnancy, STD's, abortion, and many other issues creates anxiety because we lack sexual discipline.  My pops told me, "Jay, try to avoid foolish things.  Many of us have been a young fool but don't ever become an old fool."  My prayer is for this blog post to motivate change for those who are headed towards becoming an old fool. (Proverbs 1:7)

Guys want things straight with no chaser.  They want the meat and potatoes of the situation.  So, I'm going to give it to you real and raw.  You have lost the art of chivalry and what being a godly man is all about.  Some of you have dealt treacherously with the wife of your youth and put her away for a younger woman.  You talk to women as if they owe you something or as if they are your servant.  You give the impression that you want to be the woman instead of a man (provider, protector, prayer leader, etc.).  You want to be courted and chased.  You have placed so much pressure upon your woman that it is uncomfortable being with you.  She rather be alone.  You have created a culture where women earn the groceries, put up the groceries, cook the groceries and take out the trash.  You have lost her respect because you think you can be in a relationship but behave like you are single.  Your relationships fail because you have not become the leader of your household (it's not about finances).  If you are a man who is alone it is your own fault, me included.  Do you not understand what God meant in the book of Genesis chapter two when he said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him."  She's there to help you hold the basket while God fills it, not carry it by herself.  Your son looks up to the little loser in the park because you never take him to the playground.  Your daughter falls for guys who take her to McDonald's because you never took her.  She's living that childhood experience she missed, through some young boy.  You wonder why chaos controls your family when the answer is in the mirror.  They have not been around anyone but you.  They mimic what they observe.

I have nothing else to say.  The Lord has spoken.  If you want change ask God directly for wisdom which he gives freely or contact me (www.godgotus.org).  God has graced me to help those, rich or poor, to learn to operate from a foundation of love.  First step, that foundation must be established.  We all have sinned.  But let's not continue in it.  If you know you need help but refuse to ask; I pray your girlfriend, wife or children contact me.  If you have a problem with anything I've written, see God.  The enemy don't scare me.  God's got me and I only follow Jesus.

1 Corinthians 7:8

"I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I.  But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn."

My Lord my God, I ask for forgiveness of our sins.  Cleanse us and purify our hearts.  Remove all things that are not of you.  We thank you for salvation through Jesus Christ.  We desire to return to how we were originally created, in your image and in your likeness.  We have trespassed against you.  Our minds have been blinded.  We have lost sight of the men you have created us to be.  We are not worthy but save us for your name's sake.  Your word says that whosoever calls upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.  This is our call.  Thank you for saving us.  Lord, we love and trust you a trillion percent.  Please give my words life Lord that they may go forth to accomplish what they have been spoken to accomplish for your purpose.  I offer thanksgiving as I make my petitions known to you by the power and authority that is in the name of Jesus.  Amen.

Stop Relying On Your Eyes To Choose The Lover Of Your Heart

"As the lily among thorns, so is my love among the daughters."  That is a scripture from the second chapter of the Song of Solomon taken from the King James Version of the bible.  Every man should find his lily among thorns.  That unique and special daughter of God who yearns for a man that is trusted by her heavenly Father to have and to hold her for the remainder of their lives in Christ.  Proverbs chapter eighteen states, "Whoso finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor of the Lord."  Every man should want the favor of the Lord.

This blog post was motivated by four young ladies studying at a Starbucks in San Antonio, Texas.  I've written this blog to reveal a spiritual route to the chapel which every woman should consider while lonely and single.  It's not the only way but trust the process and you won't be disappointed.  If you have no desire to live righteously or revere monogamy in marriage, this blog post is not for you.

In 2009, an internet hacker named Jeff Moss was hired by the U.S. Homeland Security Advisory Council and later became Chief Security Officer for ICANN.  It doesn't take a genius to figure out how he got their attention.  I noted this incident because I believe great advice can come from someone who has defeated what you're trying to defend.  If Honda Motors wants to prevent the theft of their vehicles it would be wise to interview those who were apprehended after the auto theft.  What qualifies me to speak on a topic of divine love?  Well, allow me to share some of my past so you will understand my present.

I've flown from the east coast to the west coast and made stops in between which allowed me to meet some of the most beautiful, intelligent and fun women on this planet.  Rolex on wrist, cologne on neck, dressed to impressed, smile on deck and that was before the charm left my lips.  I remember spending a week in the Scottsdale, Arizona area.  I believe God (and the devil) sent a lot of beautiful women to that city.  No matter what city I visited I hacked the mind of many to charm the heart of all.  I wasn't doing it purposely but out of ignorance.  When I was a teenager a man in my neighborhood named Steve told me, "You are going to get a lot of women because of them eyes you have little man."  Yes, his message could have been different but he is definitely a true prophet because his prophecy became a reality.  1 Corinthians 13:11 states, "When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things."  I apologize to the women I have hurt and I forgive the women who have hurt me.  My only regret thus far in life is that I didn't follow Jesus sooner.  I pray my perspective coupled with the truth in the word of God enlightens those who no longer wish to partake in relationships destined to fail from initial eye contact.

I remember the first time I saw my first puppy, a Rottweiler.  I named him Keno.  Before picking him up from the breeder I purchased a book about Rottweiler's and sought counsel from owners of this breed.  I wanted to make sure I was prepared to take care of him.  I bathed him, fed him, trained him, walked him, protected him, watched television with him in my lap and took him on trips in my car.  I fell in love with my puppy.  He truly became my best friend.  Keno died before his third birthday.  Why did that happen to me?  I did what I knew to do.  My point for sharing this story is that I put more effort towards selecting my puppy than towards selecting a possible life-long mate.  None of my female lovers died but it felt as if they did when our relationship fell short of lasting forever.  In time, I gave up on love.  I began dating without emotion.  Why would I risk getting hurt or hurting someone?  Instead of a spirit, soul and body connection it became all physical.  Premarital sex, dinner, movies, bars, weekend getaways and many other thrills but nothing to establish a solid foundation.  Beliefs, goals, passions, health concerns and spirituality were not discussed.  Nothing to propose a potential marriage was established.  I didn't know how to love myself or any woman until I began following Jesus.  By reading and meditating on the scriptures I learned how to care for a daughter of God.  I don't want you to assume marriage will organically happen, as I did.  You must be intentional.  Therefore, the five points below will help you identify a honest, funny, humble and caring man who's ready to love you the way Jesus loves the church as both of you do the will of God.

First, the man who finds you will see you as his spiritual sister because you share the same Father in heaven.  It is an important first step in establishing a relationship which is pleasing to God.  A man who allows Jesus to live through him is a giver.  He's a man that loves unconditionally and selflessly.  If you date someone who doesn't share that perspective, you expose yourself to receive what a man of the world has to give (or take).  2 Corinthians 6:14 says, "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?"  Only trust what you believe and only believe what you trust.

Second, blessed is the woman that waits upon the Lord.  Be holy, obedient, pray, fast and ask God to send the man he desires for you.  That doesn't mean sit at home or join every dating site.  Study the bible word by word and scripture by scripture to show yourself approved to God.  If a man doesn't come quickly or ever come, continue in fellowship with the Lord without distraction.  Let God know he is number one in your life.  I believe he will give you what you have believed him for in prayer.

Third, only date for marriage.  Otherwise it's called a friendship.  It's not necessary to kiss several toads to find a prince.  If a dealership allows a man to drive a car for free why in the H-E-Double L would he buy it?  Set spiritual boundaries and don't get weary in right doing.  1 John 1:6-7 says, "If we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth:  7.  but if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanses us from all sin."  Ask for forgiveness of your sins, humble yourself before God and resist falling victim to the former lusts in your ignorance.  You are precious to God and he loves you very much.

Fourth, if you see bananas on an orange tree there is a problem.  Don't write it off as a mistake.  There is a reason why an error is revealed to you.  Confront him.  Challenge him.  Try his spirit.  Let him go, straighten your halo and remain patient.  This is a marathon not a race.  Ask God for discernment of the Holy Spirit.  Judge a tree by the fruit it bear.  Matthew 7:16 says, "You shall know them by their fruits."

Fifth, don't wait until marriage to know what it means to be a wife.  A hospital will not hire you to perform surgery on patients if you haven't graduated from medical school.  Observe your parents.  Ask questions of them and other married couples.  There is no "secret sauce" but you can minimize potential mistakes by seeking wise counsel.  After obtaining revelation turn it into revolution.  Let your behavior emulate that of a married woman.  Walk like one.  Talk like one.  Dress like one.  I'm not sure what all that entails but it beats being a sorority sister of Hoochie Phi Hoochie.  Intentionally prepare yourself to become what is beneficial for your soon-to-be husband.  Entertain and love yourself in the company of family and friends until that man of God finds you.  Remember that scripture in the opening paragraph from Proverbs chapter eighteen that reads, "Whoso finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor of the Lord."  That word of wisdom is directed toward men which tells me the woman will be a wife when she is found, not perfect, but doing the will of God.  God is so impressed with her that he calls her a "good thing".  You are exactly that my sister!

The world may see my viewpoint as rules but a different term is applied when it's an employer (policies and procedures).  A different method of acceptance is considered when it is the statutes that govern the country.  It's only acceptable to adhere to rules when it involves doing what the world views as important or justifiable.  Don't be mislead.  The book of Matthew chapter seven tells us, "Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leads to destruction, and many there be which go in there at." Which gate will you choose when a boyfriend, family, friends, co-workers or anyone who walks in darkness entice you to do what doesn't glorify God?  If you don't set boundaries for your life someone else will.

My Lord my God, I come boldly to your throne in spirit to ask in prayer that forgiveness of sins is rendered to all who ask upon reading this blog.  Your word says that no good thing will you withhold from them that walk uprightly.  May your Son, Jesus Christ, lead us as we do your will.  Please give us discernment of your Holy Spirit and a shield of faith to withstand the fiery darts of the enemy.  I command victory in our lives over the lusts of this world in the name of Jesus.  Your word didn't say a weapon wouldn't be formed against us, but it did say it shall not prosper.  Don't let us get weak when temptation comes but make us aware of the way of escape you have promised.  I thank you for prosperity, peace, purpose, a spiritual mate and divine health as we journey thru life.  We love you and trust you a trillion percent.  Give my words life Lord that they may go forth to accomplish what they have been spoken to accomplish for your name's sake.  I offer thanks as I make my petitions known to you by the power and authority that is in the name of Jesus.  Amen.

Brother Jay Welcomes You

Whosoever is led by the Spirit of God to receive of this format, I welcome you on behalf of myself and those God have sent to labor along aside of me.  Our sole purpose is to do the will of God.  This blog, godgotusbelieve.blogspot.com, is associated with www.godgotus.org which is a site purposed to edify, encourage and educate those who desire purpose in their lives.  We reveal a bible-based approach in all matters of life.  If you are opposed to our commitment to God, feel free to state your position in a respectful manner or feel free to excuse yourself.  We won't stop because this works for us!  We don't plan to push our passion on anyone or condemn those who are believers.  This format will discuss circumstances which affect the basic five components of humanity; emotional, physical, social, financial and spiritual well-being.

Jesus stated, "The thief comes not but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly."  I have been sent to meet those drawn by God before their wall of destruction and lead them to deliverance, at the feet of Jesus.  It doesn't matter if you are lost in complete darkness or roaming around in the shade, it is pertinent for communion with God that you walk in the light.  We rely on the trinity to lead us in revelation of the truth in the scriptures that bring forth revolution.  Jesus is a revolutionist.  The first chapter of the book of James states, "But be you doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves."  The person that is walking in darkness receives mercy more so than the person who walks around in the shade but proclaims the light.  In Corinth, Paul told the people, "Whether therefore you eat, or drink, or whatsoever you do, do all to the glory of God."  If you desire to take a journey with us of allowing God to reinvent you through the five basic components mentioned above, then this is the blog for you.

A man once stated to me that if you want to keep anything from a minority (social status not racially driven), put it in writing.  That fact wasn't solely directed toward those who can't read but also those who won't read.   In this age a person that can't read isn't totally lost because most literature is placed in an audio format.  Get intentional about your life.  Contend for the desires of your heart.  Allow God to direct your steps.  If you don't believe in him today, I promise if you begin to read his word you will be better off than you were, hoping and waiting for prosperity to knock on your door.  You must do something.  Ask any 12 year old if ask, seek and knock are action verbs.  Matthew 7:7 says, "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and you shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you."  Doing something is better than sitting on the dock of the bay.  God told Noah to build the ark.  Jesus told the ten lepers, "Go show yourselves to the priests."  I haven't always, but now I trust the Lord my God a trillion percent.  I never thought God would use me to heal the sick let alone speak his word to his creation (you).  In weeks to come under "Testimonials" on the home page of www.godgotus.org, you will witness accounts spoken by those who God has blessed through me by the power and authority in the name of Jesus.  The glory is God's alone.  Only follow me as I follow Jesus.

Once again, you are welcome to take this journey in realizing the fullness of God.  You will not always like what I write or what I say but it will be truth.  May your minds, ears and hearts be opened to receive so you may bear much fruit.  I look forward to enjoying our fellowship now and even more on the other side with the King of kings and the Lord of lords.  No matter what you are going through or how bad things appear in this world, remember God got us!  Believe.